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Posted 2 May, 2008 in American Professor in China, Chinese Education, China Business Consultant, China Expat, Education in China, 中国, Confucius Slept Here, Expats, Intercultural Issues, Teaching in China, China Editorials, China Business, China Expats
Useful (or not) Idiot Awards… (0)
There used to be a British radio show that called people and and tastelessly handed out the “Richard Cranium” award to folks nominated by co-workers or employees You can’t imagine how many people fell for the ruse and were thrilled to get such an honor. Well, I am going to be more transparent: I am going to get Ryan at Dao by Design to make me a snazzy award for an intermittent “Useful Idiot” award. In the interim you can visualize your own trophy.
Today’s dubious honors go to:
New Zealand’s Stuff news online. One the eve of an historic free trade agreement and a visit by NZ leader Helen Clark, with China that will abolish tariffs for NZ exporters Stuff has genius advice–archived stuff from the Cultural Revolution–for Kiwis looking to do biz in China in an article titled, Business in China Will Never be Easy:
*Choose your local partners, go-betweens, staff and translators carefully. The Chinese notion of relationship is complex. Do it well and reap the reward, get it wrong and you are almost bound to fail.
*Have plenty of cash, suppliers in China do not give credit to newcomers but expect it from you.
*Be prepared for a frustrating time with Chinese banks, they are bureaucratic and inefficient.
*Make sure contracts are clear and the English version is compatible with the Chinese.
*Get a good lawyer, there is every chance you will need one.
Early in the article they talked about economies bleeding red ink in some sad warfare metaphor just as the NZ chief spoke of a 5% increase in imports to China over the last year as NZ is now China’s 4th largest trade partner. Then there was the horrible failure of Dunkin’ Donuts in China (in 2000!!) that somehow missed that they are back and planning 100 shops in the next ten years. I have it on good authority–Marc–that DD in Shanghai is doing well. And Marc’s consumption alone could finance the operation of a small store.
The section on the recent failure of Lionsbridge Breweries (2003!) is also a wiener. The company–promise not to laugh–spent $170,000,000USD on a joint beer making venture to create more booze in a country where there is already 600+ breweries. D’oh.
These guys obviously don’t listen to the podcasts about doing business in China at CBN.
The next award goes to Anthony Marx (no relation to Groucho or Karl) the prez of Amherst College in America.
CCTV 9 (CCTV 9 is to TV stations as Macau is to Las Vegas) interviewed Tony today. If you turned down the sound and just watched Tony it looked like Bush reading Horton Hears a Hu to hearing impaired kindergarten children and if you left the sound on it just sounded like Bush.
He got trapped into being an apologist for the racial and economic disparities in American elite schools. Were it a parliamentary debate the resolution” America is racist, snobby, expensive place to get educated–especially at our school” then the government (CCTV–ironic, huh?) won the match. In a country (China) where a qualified student can attend a top ten school for $750 USD a year he spoke to how Amherst is graciously offering the same tuition rates ($45,000 with room) to International students as they do to the kids in their recovering gang members from the Bronx affirmative action program.
I woke up and caught a few sound bites I liked like that alluded to the fact that market forces will lower “elite” school tuition. He said that Harvard and Yale would likely follow his lead to stay competitive. I am guessing that Duke and MIT recruiters also stay awake nights wondering what Marx will think of next to steal the best and brightest.
And then he went on to say that some recent innovations actually allowed his admissions team to actually read more applications submitted and more of of the ones they actually did inspect. So, I will do some recon’ on the prelim screening, but in the interim be sure not to use a hotmail address as they go right in the dumper and for god’s sake use the watermarked paper!
Congrats guys!!!
Posted 7 April, 2008 in American Professor in China, Education in China, Ryan Mclaughlin, New Zealand, Chinese Education, 中国, Humor, China Humor, Intercultural Issues, In the news, Macau
China: No Country for Compliments (0)
I was at Web Wednesday in Hong Kong last week when a veteran expat in China shared with me a new version of a very familiar story.
My friend spoke of traveling to America with a Chinese love interest. It was the first visit abroad for the Chinese half of the couple. Ans after a few days in the land that invented super-sizing the first time tourist said to my friend, “You don’t seem fat at all compared to other Americans.”
One of the things you will get over VERY quickly in China is the need for validation by students, colleagues or friends. The Chinese don’t give one another a break, so don’t expect one for yourself. Sure, they will hand you a compliment, but….
Even with all of the fawning that goes on with a new foreign male or young female teacher there is always an addendum…. Here are but a couple real ones.
–”Your classes are less boring than the last teacher’s…”
–”I will tell you the secret: many students think you are very handsome, including me. But, you have no muscle. Just do some more exercise. Do you love Tennis?”
–”Here is the name of the girl who is in the hospital. It would be nice for you to call her, but don’t say anything. It might upset her.”
–”Maggie, you are very pretty, even with a big bum.”
And even the the most recognizable foreigner in China, DaShan (pictured above), has his moments. Here is a man who was recognized by the government as one of the most influential foreigners of the 90’s in China. On his personal website he has had to settle for a testimonial from the Chinese media in Shenzhen: “…not the least bit inferior to top Chinese performers.”
My students who, when actually speaking, will often do so using the Papal “We”. They recently told me about an earlier teacher (a favorite topic) who was frustrated that he could not elicit responses from the group: “We think he talked too much and didn’t let us speak.” I asked the group if they thought he may have just not understood that the Chinese idiom, “The nail that sticks up gets beaten down,” was still a social mandate (suspended for criticism of teachers, of course) of which he was not aware. I went on to ask whether or not they thought that he might have been confused or even a bit intimidated and subsequently talked more to alleviate his anxiety. They responded that “all of us think” he should have been more knowledgeable about how to teach Chinese students. And then they went on to criticize foreign teachers for not staying around more than a year at a time–the government mandated length of a normal, albeit renewable, teaching contract.
So, now when they ask me how I like teaching here I say, “We like it. It is good preparation for a career as a correctional officer in an American penitentiary.”
Posted 9 March, 2008 in Chinese Media, 中国, Chinese Education, American Professor in China, Education in China, China Expat, Weird China, Teaching in China, Asian Humor, China Humor, Asia, China Expats, Intercultural Issues, Humor
Festival de año nuevo in Guangzhou… (3)
I have belonged to a Guangzhou expat group on Facebook for some time. It has kept me abreast of new happenings, restaurants and cultural events. though I rarely attend activities: they usually are hosted in clubs where talk is difficult and drinking, with intermittent dancing, is the activity of choice. Too, we dinosaurs from the days of bell-bottoms and idealism have generally been been replaced by the fashionably ambitious and youth-centric; so, it is tough on we professors who age externally, but remain youthful by association. I often find I don’t have lot in common socially with my contemporaries who are not,as I am, witness to ongoing cultural changes and they are more concerned about the price of their medication than the newest application on Twitter. And while I am grousing: I find that too many of the newer arrivals, old and young, are often disgruntled and have half of their clothes packed or half unpacked with plans for a midnight run should the culture get anymore overwhelming. And it is hard to find a good cheeses to go with their familiar whines…
Last evening I headed for a Mexican Fiesta (a $7.00 USD all-you-can-eat Buffet and no party favors) to meet some 30-odd people whose primary connection c was a chance meet-up created on Facebook by a GZ resident. What a testament to social networking, aye?
To my surprise there was not teacher (Isn’t every laowai in China an English teacher?) in the bunch and virtually everyone worked for a foreign company– most for emerging or established IT firms. I met the 30 year old CEO and founder of a German software development firm (who knew this blog–so, he has to be a good guy, right?), a marketer for a Japanese interactive ad agency, another marketing professional from an on-line game company, sourcing agents, a chocalateer and an on-line travel agent among others. What a geekish joy it was to actually talk in English to people loving their jobs, this city and who were bullish about Guangzhou being “the place to be for IT” in the future. I have been shouting that for two years and the voice back this time was not an echo…
One surprise: a Chinese student, of two years ago was in attendance. She quickly had the group eyeing me with suspicion as she told them how strict I had been as a teacher, that is until she revealed that her fear stemmed from my insistence she arrive on time for lessons and turn off her cell phone during class. I went from Lector to lamb in the squint of an eye and then told her, in gentle professorial tones that it was good to see her face for a change not distorted by the glow of an incoming text message.
I went home, watched Hillary Clinton on Letterman, and mused on how America and Guangzhou may be in for great change.
Feliz Año Nuevo!
Posted 6 February, 2008 in Guangzhou, Chinese Internet, The Internet, Chinese New Year, Chinese Media, 中文, Faceboook, Education in China, China Expat, American Professor in China, Chinese Festivals, Guangzhou China, Intercultural Issues, China Expats, Asia, Asian Humor, Teaching in China, China Business, 中国, Personal Notes, Confucius Slept Here, China Humor
It is OMBW’s Free Degree Day! (4)
Tired of no respect? Weary of fellow Airport Security officers ribbing you for taking vocational education all five years of High School? Do you think George Bush could beat you on Scrabulous? The answer for you is here today on OMBW!
Get instant respect from the school and for no money!!!
There is one small catch. You need to pass this simple test:
1. What stands out in this picture from an Internet advertised English Training school (移动英语—沟天下 易如反掌) I discovered today on the Chinese net (YES, REALLY!): MOBILE SCHOOL
If you answered, “David quit dyeing his hair!” you are on your way to a new and profitable career as a China fake-goods spotter. That alone will save you tons of dough on eBay and Craigslist!*
Now the tough one:
2.What is unusual about the school’s certificate of appointment from Harvard University?
If you answered, “There weren’t three Decembers in 2004!” you are almost there!**
Last question: Why do they call it the Mobile training center?
And if you answered, “Where the hell is stuff I paid for?” you can download your Jiade diploma right now:
*Harry?
**Chinglish in the citation…and Harvard has a Principal?
Posted 30 July, 2007 in 中国, In the news, Photos, Chinese Internet, Internet marketing China, Education in China, 中文, Chinese Media, Just Plain Strange, Personal Notes, Asian Humor, China Humor, Humor, Teaching in China, China Editorials, Weird China, China Photos, China Business, China web 2.0
Interning the poor…. (0)
One online dictionary defines interning as:
- The act of training someone for a job or vocation
- Restriction to a locale, country or prison
Recently a group of girls in Guilin who were training to be dancers were sent by school officials to intern in their craft. They lived in Guilin, a part of the exceedingly poor Guanxi autonomous region often in the news lately for civil disturbances related to government enforced birth control and abortion.
I don’t know about Guanxi, but in areas of Guangdong, arts schools and their charges are not held in high regard. Dancing, painting, contemporary music and poetry are often thought to be frivolous activities meant for those not expected to succeed in life. Business, marketing, engineering, medicine, and law are more socially acceptable here.
But most students in China, regardless of their vocational choice, are hungry for life experience in their chosen fields. They believe that transferable skills are learned in the workplace rather than the classroom and they trust teachers and authorities to guide those experiences. And most of the teachers there, a dear friend of mine among them, make about $100 USD a month for their efforts, but take their responsibilities seriously.
Xinhua news euphemistically reported this week that “The law was broken” when one school lost its moral compass and arranged for its students to work as bar girls: Guilin Intermediate Vocational Dance School’s cadre arranged “internships” for 22 teenagers in Hangzhou, China nightclubs.
The school officials told parents that their children would perform at “well-regulated places” and would each be paid 750 yuan (US$94) a month, a very hefty salary for an ethnic minority student in Guanxi, but the dark reality was they earned 100 yuan ($12.50 USD) and paid 50 yuan to an “agent,” 25 yuan to the dance school, leaving 25 yuan (a little more than $3 USD) for their them.
The most bizarre part of this story is the spin some educators and officials have put on the event: Yuan Bentao, a professor at Tsinghua University, said, “It is even more important that private schools like this maintain a respectable image so that they can survive in China’s competitive education marketplace.” Ya, that was the first thing that came into my mind.
Internet chat-rooms have called for jail time for the school officials. The school’s Chairman Guo Guisheng claims he believed he was “doing a good deed” for the impoverished girls and their families.
In all of the reporting on this issue I have seen no indication that anyone has done anything to dress the wounds that were surely opened for the girls involved. My mother and her sister were abandoned on the steps of an orphanage during America’s Great Depression because my grandparents could not afford to feed them. They never got over it emotionally and they were not morally degraded like these girls were: The students were often forced to share toasts with middle-aged businessmen then sent to bed to cry themselves into a drunken sleep.
A law firm director, Qiu Baochang, of the Beijing-based Huijia Law Firm added, “These schools have to improve their teaching if they hope to have good reputations; otherwise, they will easily fall into a vicious circle.” Alleged professionals like these make a case for the re-thinking of industrialized education in China.
It’s too late, counselor: The vicious cycle involves the haves and have-nots in your new China. The internships given to those underprivileged children better fit the definition of imprisonment. They are now socially and psychologically locked in to a wheel of poverty and trauma. The only thing these girls learned is that a lack of self-esteem for a poor child is not a self-induced psychological condition, but part of a realistic self-assessment. A prospering economy has driven off and left these dancers on the steps of bankrupt orphanage.
With big thank you to Virtual China /China.org
Posted 23 July, 2007 in Charity in China, Human Rights, 中文, Human Rights China, China Law, Education in China, Violence, 中国, Intercultural Issues, Asia, Teaching in China, China Editorials, In the news, China Cartoons, Asian Women
I will meet you for Coffee at the corner of Walk and Don’t Walk…. (9)
Adam writes on the Lehman Law Blawg [sic] that the new ordnance in Shanghai requiring foreign businesses to add Chinese characters to their name is “misguided.” He goes on to make his case: “The claim that a foreign-language-only name is a major impediment to Chinese-only speakers is dubious. Even if potential customers cannot say the name, they can refer to it in other ways, for example, ‘that pizza place on the corner of Taicang Lu and Huangpi Nan Lu.’ As for access by taxi, unless you are going to the Shanghai Museum or some other such well-known landmark, names are useless. Whether you say City Diner or a Chinese name, you’re going to have to tell the driver ‘intersection of Nanjing Xi Lu and Tongren Lu’ to get where you want to go.”
Adam, I kind of expect to be reading Chinese (authentic Traditional Chinese) in Guangzhou, and even Portuguese in Macau. Just a guess on my part, but there seems to be some ethnocentrically driven historical precedence for the annoying habit of the local governments insisting on being able to navigate streets and order in eateries using their native tongue….
In China, that country bordering the country with the man with strange hair that is building a nuke, people brought up during the cultural revolution who don’t read English or Pinyin, probably don’t know the Hard Rock Cafe from a day-old bread store, but they have heard of Xingbake (the Chinese name for Starbucks) the American coffee joint or Kendeji (pronounced cun-dutch-ee) the chicken emporium. And even the Cantonese taxi divers can take you to either one if asked…
Adam gives his jury summation thusly: “Finally, foreign-language-named businesses add to the cosmopolitan air of a city. As one strolls through the streets of New York, Los Angeles or Chicago, one will see many Spanish, Chinese, Korean, Japanese or other foreign-language-named businesses without English translations. Because Shanghai is unique in Mainland China as an international and cosmopolitan city, this diversity should be celebrated, not hindered.” Adam might have had me here if he he hadn’t introduced reasonable doubt in his argument by saying “Shanghai” and “free market” in the same sentence…But then, I lived in Chicago and did see a few businesses in ethnic neighborhoods with signs exclusively in the area’s dominant language, but most ethnic businesses in most cities have romanized names as well….The businesses intentionally wanting to appeal to immigrants left out “ease of menu translation” in their business plan to-do lists. The places looking to be cosmopolitan were smart enough to add English characters.
And if 谷哥 (Google) and 肯德基 (KFC) haven’t filed any ethnic diversity lawsuits because people here now know them better by their Chinese monikers, I doubt 星巴克 (Starbucks) is headed to court either.
By the way: “Guido”and “Boris” (their English names) from Guangzhou’s Tourism Board want to pay you a visit to discuss ways to improve on internationalizing their hick towns Hong Kong and Guangzhou… And “Makudonorudo” (the Golden Arches) in Japan wants you to represent them as they are tired of their name sounding like a morning rooster in the ads that air in the backwater town of Tokyo….
Adam is held in contempt of culture unil further notice…
Posted 21 July, 2007 in The Internet, Chinese Internet, Guangzhou China, 中国, Chinglish, Guangzhou, 中文, Education in China, China Law, Shanghai, China Expat, China Business Consultant, In the news, Confucius Slept Here, Greater Asia Blogs, Asia, Asian Humor, China Humor, Humor, Japan, China Expats, Weird China, China Business, China Editorials, Intercultural Issues, China web 2.0
Study in America: Study in US Guides (3)
Head over to BOD for recommendarions on where to study in the US, UK and Australia….
For anyone dreaming of university study in America: The China Dreamblogue has posted pdf guides on how to study in America, in both English and in Chinese…
This is a guide to undergraduate study and educational opportunities in the US. You can find Arabic, French, Spanish, and Russian versions of the text: Study in America: American undergraduate Study.
This guide explains the process of applying for and preparing for graduate study in the US. It includes information about admission, types of institutions, degrees, course loads, and grading systems. It will also discuss the different academic culture in the US and the US academic environment. It also covers specialized programs of study in the US: US nursing school, American law schools, US veterinary medicine, and American dentistry. You can find versions of the text in Arabic, French, Spanish, and Russian here: Study in the US: US Graduate Degree.
This guide provides thorough descriptions of short-term study options in the US, such as: high school exchange programs, work and professional exchange programs, vocational and technical programs, short-term university study, and professional study. You can find versions of the text in Arabic, French, Spanish, and Russian here: Study in America: Short-term US study.
This guide provides important details on preparing for study in the US, such as obtaining a visa, predeparture information, housing in the us, and travel to the us. You can find versions of the text in Arabic, Chinese, English, and Russian here: Study in the US: US Visas, arriving in US, and travel to the US.
Posted 18 July, 2007 in Travel in China, Charity in China, Chinese Medicine, Blogroll Diving, Guangzhou, 中文, Chinese Education, Education in China, china books, China Expat, China Business Consultant, Internet marketing China, Chinese Internet, Teaching in China, China Editorials, Expats, Intercultural Issues, Asia, China Cartoons, China Business, The Internet, Guangzhou China, 中国, Confucius Slept Here, Greater Asia Blogs
It is OMBW’s Free Degree Day! (2)
Tired of no respect? Weary of fellow Airport Security officers ribbing you for taking vocational education all five years of High School? Do you think George Bush could beat you on Scrabulous? The answer for you is here today on OMBW!
Get instant respect from the school and for no money!!!
There is one small catch. You need to pass this simple test:
1. What stands out in this picture from an Internet advertised English Training school (移动英语—沟天下 易如反掌) I discovered today on the Chinese net (YES, REALLY!): MOBILE SCHOOL
If you answered, “David quit dyeing his hair!” you are on your way to a new and profitable career as a China fake-goods spotter. That alone will save you tons of dough on eBay and Craigslist!*
Now the tough one:
2.What is unusual about the school’s certificate of appointment from Harvard University?
If you answered, “There weren’t three Decembers in 2004!” you are almost there!**
Last question: Why do they call it the Mobile training center?
And if you answered, “Where the hell is stuff I paid for?” you can download your Jiade diploma right now: